Friday, September 28, 2012

The Crazy Hamster Wheel of Mommyhood...

Now I know all you moms out there can relate to feeling a bit out of control of your life sometimes… Case in point, last weekend I showed up with kids in tow 2 hours early to a birthday party! Imagine the mom’s surprise to see me in her doorway (feeling punctual and organized, of course!) with present in hand and Evan ready to party at 10am when her party didn’t start until noon! Since everything was very calm and no one else was there, I clearly sensed something was amiss! “The party does start at 10, doesn’t it?” I sheepishly asked as her son eagerly took the present out of Evan’s hand. She smiled understandingly as she answered, one crazed mom to another, and I quickly realized I had written it down wrong in the once fail-safe calendar system that runs my life. Garbage in, garbage out, right?! The fail-safe system doesn’t work if mommy’s brain cells are decreasing by the minute!

So let me first of all wish you and your family a Happy Belated Mother’s Day! Because you know that we all try to do it all and often make mistakes or arrive 2 hours early to a party as we juggle our family’s lives, do the laundry, figure out what’s for dinner (even if it’s eggs or cereal sometimes), clean the kitchen and bathrooms (again!), sign everyone up for everything so they don’t miss out on anything, (God forbid!), drive them to everything everywhere, do the grocery shopping at 5 different stores to make our mostly organic budget stretch, decide at what point the cheese stick or gogurt can be put back in the fridge if it’s been the lunchbox all day (what is the call on that?!), bark orders to get them ready for school, make sure homework is done and taken to school the next day and/or drive it to school after drop-off because you feel bad it was laying on the counter amidst the 50 other coloring papers and of course he didn’t see it, tie or untie shoes, manage screen time, playdates, arguments, moods (including our own), careers and shoes (does anyone put them away?!) and try and go to bed each night feeling like you’ve done everything or anything well!

I commend all of us for running this crazy hamster wheel of mommyhood each day, since we know in our hearts that when we first joyously saw that positive blue mark on the pregnancy test we had absolutely no idea what we were signing up for and could never foresee that a career change, although we may sometimes long for it, is not in the cards! For there are those days when the kids are grumpy, blaming everything on you and won’t stop bickering when you wish you had signed up for something else entirely, like traveling Europe with a backpack or living on a tropical island as a care-free waitress with a special friend named Brad…

And then, in the midst of all the chaos, you have your “MOMMY MOMENT“; your daughter, out of nowhere, comes up to give you a hug and tell you how much she loves you and you understand from the bottom of your heart how pure and unconditional that love is. Or your concerned son‘s face lights up when he sees you walking towards him in the morning school line as he realizes that you didn‘t leave without saying goodbye after all, and you realize that you being there to say goodbye really does make a difference to him. Or your 11-year old, who is almost as big as you are, still wants to sit in your lap, give you a hug and kiss and ask for a trip to Target… Okay, so maybe they aren’t all tear-jerking mommy moments!

And so we realize on any given day that the positive blue mark was only the beginning of a lifetime of pushing and pulling, swelling and contraction, and daily joy, fear, anger, excitement and sheer determination needed to not only give birth, but to be the great moms we all are. So I hope you had a relaxing day! Now get back on that wheel!

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